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Who I Am...

Do you have a really dirty carpet?  Need to clean up a big mess in a small amount of time?  And are you tired of using the standard noisy vaccum cleaner to get these types of jobs done? Well, for those of you lucky enough to be reading this right now, you're dirty house floor prayers have been answered!  Introducing: My times in the 400 and 200!  They SUCK!  They suck so bad that they'll pick up any kind of dirt, dust or other small particle right off the ground.  They're not like Jeremy Wariner's PR's in the 200/400 which don't suck at all!  My 200 and 400 PR's will suck that dirt right off your floor and leave not even the most microscopic particles behind.  Think I'm kidding you?  Just check out my 400 and 200 times from any meets in the '08 season and you'll see their sucking power!  In fact, my 400 PR isn't even under a minute! WOAH!  Now, you're probably thinking that all the sucking power you recieve with my 200 and 400 meter PR's costs a fortune.  But if you call our number now, you'll recieve my 200 and 400 PR's for 1,000,000 easy payments of just one frickin dollar!  WHAT A DEAL! But wait there's more!  If you call within the next 30 milleniums, we'll throw in my 100 PR absolutely free (Free meaning that my 100 PR is not in jail and able to roam about the Earth as it wishes;-)).  My 100 PR not only sucks as much as my 200/400 PR's, it blows as well!  You'd be a worse sucker than my 100/200/400 PR's to pass up this wonderful value.  So call 1-774-090-889-675-897-908-666-7789-0903-4456-6117-9004-8767-9098-6773-7786-9099-4456-7865-2345-6789-1221-2354-3247-0000-13-69-420-666-1111-88-444-777897456432156-0095-7789000-75444-0888789061442765433333-99887656458990-888-2 today and start experiencing the raw suckness of my 100/200/400 PR's! Don't dealy, call today! (I'm gonna hang myself pretty soon cause I'm so slow so call A.S.A.P.!;-))

 

Latest Blog Update

TRADGEDY HAS STRUCK EMPB28's WORLD AGAIN!!!!!!

I bet all you Runnerspacers didn't think it was possible but it happened at about 10 to 10 last night.  My heart was broken.  So what broke it you ask?  Having to go back to work for the new school year?  Jason Mraz's "I'm Yours" reaching 72 weeks on the Billboard (s)ho(o=i)t 100?  Yeah, those are GOOD guesses.  But a jack-off little country called America is resposible for the depression I feel today.  This country, which dug itself a hole through to China with econmic problems in recent years, voted the best god-damn crap bastard hell ass piss b*tch sh*t f**king Colbie Caillat act PERIOD out of America's Got Talent last night!  Apparently, we think someone sitting on their ass and singing some cheezy-ass ballad is more entertaining than doing a flip, through a flaming hoop, AND DUNKING A BASKETBALL!  WOW! :P  This country really pissed me on and off by doing this.  Acrodunk more than DESERVES to AT LEAST be in the final.  And guess what?  THIS ISN'T THE FIRST TIME!!!  Back in 2006, this same kick ass (and all other body parts for that matter!) basketball dunking routine didn't even make it past round 2!  Instead we (not including me!) sent Nathan Burton through, whose magic acts were Lametably And Malevolently Egregious (abbr. LAME!).  So I guess you just have to sick a guitar in your hands and fire up those vocal cords to impress Americans nowadays!  They won't accept anything else!  Thus, I think Matt Barnhart should go on AGT next season.  Why?  It's simple.  HE'S A SINGER!  Because in a country full of blockhead-talent show voters like this, his Kara Goucher-stalker anthems to be highly favored over ANY daredevil act!   Hell, I could take up singing and enter myself in the competition!  I bet I'll win right away!  GOD BLESS AMERICA! Land that I love.......to hate for having such shitty respect for UNIQUE talent! :P

Last Updated: Sep 3 2009, 08:29 PM
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Viewing Page 15 of 15 - 149 posts total
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Sep 4 2008, 05:26 PM, ross wrote:

Picking a few RunnerSpace vets to Help test the NEW forum!

 
Sep 4 2008, 05:08 PM, MaxSilva wrote:

There are over 4200, I think, so not the country's biggest.

 
Sep 4 2008, 04:51 PM, Becki Michael wrote:

yeah, I CAN run the mile....in 4:50!  haha...where does that put me in the nation?  let alone the world????  sometimes dreams change, and they lead us to better things!  Im thrilled to be able to run the marathon, so no worries, im very happy with my plight! haha!  hope all is well!

 
Sep 4 2008, 12:00 PM, wieczorek wrote:

yeah no prob..wiz-or-ick

 
Sep 4 2008, 04:40 AM, cole wrote:

i just read all really confusing stuff in the help section.

 
Sep 2 2008, 08:49 PM, travis wrote:

I guess the track at Lane is blue, because blue is basically one of the school's main colors. I like that it is blue, something different.

 
Aug 24 2008, 11:10 PM, Colleen W wrote:

 yeah I have run Portland, 3:39 in 2006 3:29 in 07 3 weeks post-pneumonia... nothing to write home about by certainly not horrible... B-Q's in both cases so that is a plus. I like your intro - I was laughing my butt off! (that was the great big thump you heard, as it hit the ground!)

 
Aug 2 2008, 07:28 PM, ross wrote:

So what are your prs...

 
Jul 31 2008, 10:35 PM, Scherer wrote:

On hole 17, hit the ball full force and aim it up and to the left so that it barely goes by the first wall (about 45 degrees). This should shoot it up to the top and right next to the hole and you tap it in for two. good luck!

 
 

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