I was ready the stadge was set, I was having the best year of my life, I was undefeated against all the Americans this outdoor season with new PBs and the USA champs in my backyard I was ready for something big. 

I woke up Sunday June 28th and felt great I just knew things were going to fall in place.  I have not been this excited for a meet ever because I just knew my body was ready to put on a show.  During my jump warm ups I was missing bars because I was being lazy but I knew that I felt so good it wouldnt matter.  Finally I knew that warm ups were closing down and I had five minutes to finish up.  I put the bar up to 2.20m (7-2.5) and made it with easy and again the confidence was back. 

I usually start jumping at 2.20m (7-2.5) but since the field size was so big I decided to start at 2.15m (7-0.5) so I wouldnt be waiting around to take my first jump.  I made this with ease then 2.20m (7-2.5) and 2.25m (7-4.5) all easy bars for me.  Then 2.28m (7-5.75) was next.  My first jump I approached the bar well but wasn't running through my last two steps the way I know that I could have and it caused me to just bairly graze the bar on the way down with my legs.  I all of a sudden caught myself laughing inside because I knew that this is a height that usually comes at ease for me.  I then tried to muscle over the 2nd attempt because I let my emotions get ahold of me.  And it led to another miss!  Finally I had one more attempt I knew that I needed to make this or my ultimate goal of making the world champs team was over.  I got the crowd into this jump for the first time that day ran.  I finally ran through my last few steps well and blew way over 2.28m (7-5.75) by a good 3-4 inches!  I was excited and knew that I had atleast 2 more bars in me!  I knew then that I could make 2.31m (7-7) and win the meet.  Keith Moffat and Andra Manson both missed already and I was in the drivers seat.  I got the crowd into it again and just bairly missed.  I didnt have a good take off it was annoying me.  I felt as though my last few steps could be run A LOT better.  Then my second attempt I had a horrible take off and still bairly missed.  Finally my third attempt.  I got angry at myself because this is a height that I have been clearing all year with ease and knew that I had to make it to get top three.  I wanted it too much and pressed in my run.  I came down on the bar and missed for the third time.  I felt like I was shot in the head and laid down on the pit speachless.  I didnt know what to do.  I wanted to be a a good sport but was shocked inside and kept on saying to myself that my dream was over this year! 

I came back to the area where all the other high jumpers were and I congradulated the three that beat me and I could see the remorse in their eyes.  I could tell they too were shocked that I didnt make the team.  I didnt know what to do or where to go.  All my hard training, hard work dedication and commitment to making this team was crushed all at once.  I wanted to just flee and run home.  (I live 2 miles from the track)  But as I went through the media ducking and saying no comment to everyone I found myself in a large crowd of people saying that I had to stay and get drug tested.  I was screaming in my head and wishing I could just vanish.  I was trying to be as nice as possible to everyone even though inside I hurt bad real bad.  I had to sign up for the World Champs team as an alternate and wow was that hard to do!  I had to stay and extra 2 hours before I could finally flee the scene. 

Once this was finally over, I went home leaped into bed laid head first into my favorite pillow and screamed and screamed and screamed.  And you know what it made me feel 10000x better!

After this, the pain set inside me.  I couldnt sleep well for several nights.  People kept on asking and emailing me what went wrong Jesse?!  Still even to this day I get asked all the time about it.  But what can I do now?  Well the answer is go out to Athens where my next meet is and get a new PB!  That sounds like a good goal for me right now!  I know that this very possible.  I will be facing great competition including Ivan Ukhov who has been almost unbeatable this year and this really excites me.  world.  So keep your eyes open this Monday for the results in Athens because I am ready! 

Thanks for reading guys

Also I want to wish Tora Harris, Andra Manson and Keith Moffat much success in Berlin I will be cheering them on! 

Last year when I was preping for the Olympic Trials I had a totally different mind set.  I was uptight and worried.  This year I am relaxed and carefree.  Yesterday I went fishing with two close friends on the McKinzie river.  Fly fishing actually.   It was great I was able to clear my head completely and enjoy Gods beautiful wildlife creations.  The only negative was that I got a lot of sun!  I was out for 4 hours and got burned.  But its alright I got a full day to recover.  Today I will do my pre meet warm up in the middle of watching my girl friend compete in the heptathlon. 

I am excited to compete and have my hometown Hayward field crowd behind me one last time this year. 

"Attitude determines altitude"

Jesse

I am really excited to compete again!  I feel like things are going real well and another PB could be in the making if everything goes as planned.  I will be competing against some of Americas best....Andra Manson (current world leader with 2.35m), Dusty Jonas and Jamie Nieto.  The startlists go up today but I am not sure who else will be jumping. 

Last meet I cleared 2.34m a new outdoor PB and had some good looks at 2.37m.  I am really not sure what I am going to be capable of this weekend but things are looking on the upside. 

I want to wish everyone who is competing this weekend luck!

Jesse

During the warm ups it seemed like everyone was struggling.  The pit didnt seem like a pit it seemed more like a soaked sponge.  Landing on that thing was like diving into a pool of water.  Then they announced the opening height to us and to everyones surprise it was 2.15m (7-0.5).  I feel like if the weather was nice 2.15m would be perfectly fine but under there conditions its seemed silly to have such a high opening height.  (Looking back I thought they should have had an opening height lowered 5 to 10cm)  As the warm ups went on I myself started feeling adapting to the weather and gaining confidence for the start of the competition.   

I was in the middle of the order and was the first to clear 2.15m after 5 jumpers missed the opening height on the first attempt.  For me this first jump was a good jump.  I was happy and started gaining confidence.  After 4 people NH'ed the bar then went up to 2.20m (7-2.5). 

After watching all the jumpers at the previous height I knew that if I could make this bar on the first attempt I would probably win the meet.  I knew I had to make this bar.  And I did just that.  It was a poorly excecuted jump but I managed to make the bar with some room to spare.  And then 4 more people are eliminated from the competition with only 3 of us remaining. 

I felt like now I was in control of the competition.  Fortunately it was good enough for the W.  On all three of my jumps at 2.24m (7-4.25) I felt as though I was trying to get off the ground fast but couldn't do it for some reason.  I could not set up my take off the way I normally do.  I knew I was more than capable of making that next bar but ultimately could not get her done!  The other two competitors missed out at that height and I was named the winner. 

I was of course happy with the win but it was bittersweet.  Who knows what would have happend if the weather was different.  I love competing at the Drake Relays despite the cold and rain there were still a lot of fans getting into every jump which made it a lot of fun for us jumpers.  For the 100th Anniversary of the Drake Relays it will be a rememborable one for me because fo the win and the weather. 

I am looking forward to competing again.  The next competition for me will be May 9 in Eugene, OR (Oregon Twilight Meet).  If the weather is nice a jump over 2.30m would be nice....so we will see what happens

4/25 Drake Relays, Des Moines, Iowa

5/9 Twilight meet Eugene, Oregon

5/24 Belem, Brazil GP Meeting

6/7 Prefontaine Classic GP Meeting

6/14 Harrry Jerome Classic

6/28 USA Outdoor Champs

7/7 Lasaunne, SUI SGP Meeting

7/13 Athens, GRE GP Meeting

7/25 London, GBR SGP Meeting

7/31 Stockholm, Sweden SGP Meeting

8/19 and 8/21 Must qualify (top 3 USA champs) World Champs Berlin, Germany

8/31 Gateshead, GBR GP Meeting

9/6 Rieti, ITA AP Meeting

9/12-13 Must qualify (based on point system) World Athletics Final Greece

9/20 Shanghai, China GP Meeting

I might throw a couple a other meets in there but it looks like a fun schedule this year and am looking forward to my season opener at Drake relays this year. 

Also AP (Area Permit Meeting) GP (Grand Prix) and SGP (Super Grand Prix)